Are You out There?
Posted in The Life of the Historian and tagged with Boys, Lists, Singleness on February 9, 2009In the interest of the promised disclosure in this area, I should probably let you know that I think I might be going on a date some time soon.
With a millionaire. I aim big, ya know?
I saw an ad on facebook advertising, “Meet single verified millionaire men who are looking to date classy women. Join MeetingMillionaires for free. Date a 10!”
I can’t wait. I mean, why mess with someone who works hard for his piddling paychecks when I can have a certified millionaire?
Seriously though, I don’t know what his checking account balance has to do with being a “10.” They’re both numbers, but that’s about the only correlation I can see.
I saw a similar “what I’m looking for in a guy” list on Emma’s blog, so I thought I’d share mine. The bulk of this is from 2005 (I haven’t needed to update it much since).
Characteristics in a Mate
1. Knows the Word (Psalm 1:2)
spends time in it daily
actively pursuing a life in accordance with it
seeks to memorize and meditate on it
2. Honest/has integrity (Titus 2:7-8)
seeks to tell the truth even when it is not easy or convenient
3. Leader in ministry, invests in others (Proverbs 31:23, Titus 1:9)
others look up to him
he seeks to invest and encourage younger believers
not afraid to take charge when needed
4. Teachable
seeks to learn even from unlikely situations
feels he can learn from younger believers too
5. Has a servant heart
humble
places others’ interest above his own
observant of how he can help others
6. Seeks counsel (Proverbs 20:18)
Meets with older men on a semi-regular basis
Seeks counsel and help making decisions
Seeks godly counsel
7. Has a heart for the lost
Has non-Christian friends
Seeks to show them Christ
8. Strong in prayer
Prays for himself, me, others around him, non-Christians, the world
Seeks God in prayer first
9. Hard worker
Overcomes laziness
Does more than his “fair share”
10. Intelligent
Can have an intelligent, thought-provoking conversation with me
11. Likes kids
Plays with them
Wants some of his own someday
Would consider adoption
12. Willing to devote his life to ministry overseas or in the states
13. Willing and able to correct me in love
14. Seeking to become more godly: holy, righteous, self-controlled (Galatians 5:22-23, Titus 1:7-8)
Obviously, no one is perfect in all of these areas, least of all me. But these are the characteristics I want to see growing in my future husband before I say, “yes.” Oh, and there are a few things I call “icing” that would be nice to have, but not deal breakers:
Likes sports
Likes to read
Plays an instrument
Likes to play games
Likes to travel
So, I want to know…are you out there, oh mystery man who fits the bill?
February 9th, 2009 at 9:31 am
Sorry I am not the mystery man.. but I do like that you know exactly what you want.. So now go out there and get it!!
February 9th, 2009 at 10:04 am
This list reminds me of “Groundhog Day” :-)
After Andie McDowell rattles off her list, Bill Murray says, “Now you’re talking about a MAN, right?”
You have an interesting list :-)
February 9th, 2009 at 10:34 am
Do you actually play an instrument? Seems random, but really it’s not. I’m just wondering why you would want a man who plays an instrument if you don’t…unless you want to be serenaded, but that really doesn’t seem like something you would want..lol.
February 9th, 2009 at 10:41 am
Keep praying! Mine met all that you mentioned except for playing an instrument – I do that part – and neither one of us really enjoys playing games – but we have with friends. God will supply all your needs and the desires of your heart – in HIS time! We’ve been married 43 years this summer! A friend of mine wrote a letter to God outlining everything like you did. She was nearing 40 when her man arrived. They’ve adopted 4 children from New Orleans and they are loving life as a family!God is good!
February 9th, 2009 at 10:58 am
Hmm, your list sounds like my husband (even the musical instrument part) but he has been taken for over 30 years. However, I’m sure that there is at least one person of your own generation out there that fits this description.
I do need to warn you, however, that with these attributes he is probably someone going into the ministry. Are you ready for that?
February 9th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
The qualities that you are looking for in a man speaks volumes about the woman that YOU are. It was just the grace of God that I married a man that was a good husband and father. I didn’t have quite as good of a list of as you. In fact I may have scribbled “he needs to make me feel pretty” on a dirty napkin but that was as close as I got.
And after THAT comment, your conversation heart advice is up!
February 9th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Wow–good luck! I can’t help but think of the reality show “Joe Millionaire” and hope this isn’t the Internet version!
Twitter: TurtleMom23
Says:
February 9th, 2009 at 6:02 pm
I believe you forgot something – someone who adores you. Not to the point of worshiping you, of course…but someone who thanks God every day for giving YOU to HIM. Cherish comes to mind.
February 10th, 2009 at 6:23 am
Hes out there somewhere Ronnica. Frequent places where this type of man will be and you’ll eventually meet your diamond. good luck!
February 10th, 2009 at 11:32 am
A man like that will be a rare find these day! But at least you know you won’t settle for just anyone. :-)
February 10th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
4. Teachable
Now my husband is 11 years younger than me so I thought he would be number 4. Opps, that was a mistake. Course, I guess I should not give up.
February 11th, 2009 at 12:30 am
I don’t think he has to be going into vocational ministry. I mean, I play an instrument (several of them in fact) and I’m not going to be a minister…at least for the time being.
February 14th, 2009 at 1:25 am
Uh, he’s out there but I’ve alraedy married him ;) There’s got to be another one. I know that you won’t settle either and you’ve talked about this before so you’re waiting for God to work. I’m excited for you :)
February 14th, 2009 at 8:41 pm
I know you’ve probably heard this before, but if you let God pick him out, then you will meet him when the time is right. And, he will NOT be what you envisioned, but a whole lot more!
February 17th, 2009 at 2:36 am
PS My husband was nothing like I envisioned in my dream guy. What I mean is, he was the complete opposite of my list, but it worked out all the same. I am glad I gave him a chance :-)