Ignorant Historian

Fearless Tranquility

Finite Life

Wartime Mentality

Style and Demeanor

Posted on August 25, 2011 by Ronnica

Second to last challenge! I’ve loved taking the time to think through these things…I need challenging.

“That in all your relationships with men you seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit in applying the Biblical vision of manhood and womanhood; that you develop a style and demeanor that does justice to the unique role God has given to man to feel responsible for gracious leadership in relation to women—a leadership which involves elements of protection and care and initiative. That you think creatively and with cultural sensitivity (just as he must do) in shaping the style and setting the tone of your interaction with men.”

And…this is a hard one.

I think what makes this one so difficult is that we’re so incredibly influenced by our messed-up culture. How men and women relate to one another have been one area where there is a lot of confusion, even in the church.

I’ve taken classes at seminary on gender issues. They were incredibly helpful, but I’m far from having everything figured out. I’m closer to understanding the theory than I am the practice.

Books and courses have been great, but I think the biggest place I’ve learned how to be a women a treat men like men is from the examples of those in my church. You can learn a lot by being invited (or wedging your way in!) into the lives and homes of those more mature and farther along than you.

Especially as a single woman, this is an area that I have to be humble and open to correction. I don’t have a husband to run ideas by or ask questions of. But there are people in my life that I hope feel comfortable to confront or correct me when needed.

Other Posts in This Series:

Fearless Tranquility

Finite Life

Wartime Mentality

Posted on August 22, 2011 by Ronnica

Thanks for understanding about last week. In the end it was definitely a good week, but it was a hard week.

So, on to more hard stuff. Today, John Piper challenges us women:

“That you develop a wartime mentality and lifestyle; that you never forget that life is short, that billions of people hang in the balance of heaven and hell every day, that the love of money is spiritual suicide, that the goals of upward mobility (nicer clothes, cars, houses, vacations, food, hobbies) are a poor and dangerous substitute for the goals of living for Christ with all your might, and maximizing your joy in ministry to people’s needs.”

I think the idea of wartime mentality—a metaphor found in scripture—is a helpful one. It reminds me of World War II when the whole country made sacrifices for the war cause.

So what does this look like? Let’s look at the wartime mentality in Scripture:

“Suffer hardship with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. No soldier in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a soldier.” – 2 Timothy 2:3-4 NASU

This is such a vivid image for me. If I was a soldier, I would not worry about the little stuff, you know? I should have the singular focus in my life.

It’s hard not to have the same goals and aims as those around me. We pick up a lot from our environment, and everything we let into our lives will influence us. Not to say that I should be a hermit—I do wish that was possible sometimes—but I need to be immersed in Scripture to the point that God’s priorities become mine.

I also think getting outside of my comfortable, middle class, Western bubble helps gain perspective. I’ve been incredibly blessed, but most of the world hasn’t had the family, financial, and educational advantages I have.

I know the goal is not to have stuff. I know the point of life isn’t to be comfortable.

But I have to remind myself of this daily.

Other Posts in This Series:

Finite Life

Photo by US Army

Finite Life

Posted on August 11, 2011 by Ronnica

This summer seems never ending, doesn’t it? Summer is my favorite season, but I think I’ve had enough. I’m ready for a change!

But apparently summer will end. We only have 4 more challenges left. Up this week:

“That you step back and (with your husband, if you are married) plan the various forms of your life’s ministry in chapters. Chapters are divided by various things—age, strength, singleness, marriage, employment choices, children at home, children in college, grandchildren, retirement, etc. No chapter has all the joys. Finite life is a series of tradeoffs. Finding God’s will, and living for the glory of Christ to the full in every chapter is what makes it a success, not whether it reads like somebody else’s chapter or whether it has in it what chapter five will have.”

This is the first one that I must say, I’m not sure I entirely agree with. Perhaps I just don’t understand his intent.

I don’t really think it matters how you view the years of your life, as long as you recognize that what God may be calling you to now, may not be what he’s calling you to forever. Sure, life has seasons, but like seasons do, they slowly change. I think rarely does life change abruptly and completely, though there are times that it does, which the term “chapters” implies to me.

So, now I’ve gotten my nitpickiness out of the way, let’s get to what perhaps he really was trying to say. I like that he encourages us women not to compare our lives with another’s. I may be able to do this or that, but just because I have the freedom to do so doesn’t mean that you will. A godly woman doesn’t come from a cookie cutter. In fact, God wants us to do different things, or he wouldn’t have gifted us differently.

At the same time, we aren’t to long for different seasons of our life, past or potential. For me, this can be a real struggle, as I find it easy to long to be a wife and a mother. Thankfully, I have friends in my life that can give me a more realistic picture of those roles than what I find in my daydreams. It’s healthy for me to get a good dose of reality!

Other Posts in This Series:

Photo by photon_de

To Be God’s Free Agent

Posted on August 4, 2011 by Ronnica

The next part of John Piper’s Challenge to Women is a bit complex when it comes to single women like me. Still, it bears considering:

“That you not assume that secular employment is a greater challenge or a better use of your life than the countless opportunities of service and witness in the home the neighborhood, the community, the church, and the world. That you not only pose the question: Career vs. full time mom? But that you ask as seriously: Full time career vs. freedom for ministry? That you ask: Which would be greater for the Kingdom— to be in the employ of someone telling you what to do to make his business prosper, or to be God’s free agent dreaming your own dream about how your time and your home and your creativity could make God’s business prosper? And that in all this you make your choices not on the basis of secular trends or yuppie lifestyle expectations, but on the basis of what will strengthen the family and advance the cause of Christ.”

Obviously, I don’t have the opportunity to choose between working full-time and ministry. Whatever else I do and however else I use my free time, I must have full-time employment in order to provide for myself. That said, I don’t define myself by my job. It’s something that I do (and try to do well), but it’s not who I am.

I may “have” to spend 40 hours a week doing what someone else tells me “to do to make his business prosper,” but there are over 100 waking hours in a week. Even considering that some of those are spent on the necessaries of commuting, personal hygiene, and chores, I have at least as many hours to spend as I choose in a week as I do hours spent doing someone else’s biding.

And how do I choose to spend those hours?

I want to be able to use my time and talents to serve God and others. Obviously, I’m still working out how that looks like in my life, and probably always will.

But perhaps one day I won’t need to be employed full-time, having a man to provide the necessities of life. Am I making choices now that will make such a transition easier? This is why I want to work hard at paying off my student debt (though this move has made that difficult), the only debt I have. I’d love not to have to carry debt into a marriage.

I’d also like not to have an expensive lifestyle, something that would hinder me now and in the future. I’m working on ways to live on less, a skill that can reap dividends over the years.

Other Posts in This Series:

Photo by wjserson

Fearless Tranquility

Posted on July 21, 2011 by Ronnica

So, last week we had the challenge to single women. This week, we turn to married women.

So does that mean I get to take a week off? Not at all! While I have no idea if I’ll ever get married (though I still hope), I am working on developing skills and characteristics that would be helpful as a wife.

So here’s the challenge from John Piper:

“That, if you are married, you creatively and intelligently and sincerely support the leadership of your husband as deeply as obedience to Christ will allow; that you encourage him in his God-appointed role as head; that you influence him spiritually primarily through your fearless tranquility and holiness and prayer.”

“Fearless tranquility”…wow. That’s what I want. I want to be so content in Christ that any disturbance in my life will not affect me. Not that I have to be stoic, but that I’m not perturbed by things not going my way. No situation is hopeless, because no situation is without God.

I recently read John Piper’s chapter in Voices of the True Woman Movement which I found incredibly encouraging (more on that later). In it, he talks about how wimpy theology makes for wimpy women. Despite the popular caricature of the evangelical view of women (weak, mindless servants), this is not at all what the Bible calls us to be, and definitely not what I want to be.

Yes, I try to live in submission to my Lord, my elders, and one day, my husband, but that’s not at all the same as blindly following. Instead, I must work on gaining skills, knowledge, experience, and wisdom that will help me better fulfill my calling.

Another thing I’ve been working on is to be more of an encouragement to the men around me. While I can’t encourage them in the same ways or to the same degree as my future husband, I can be supportive of their endeavors and let them know when they’ve been a blessing to me.

Also, I can continue to learn from the examples of the married women around me. I’ve been blessed with having many godly women in my life, and I have a lot to learn from them.

Other Posts in This Series:

Photo by nanotechi

Exploiting Not Paralyzing

Posted on July 14, 2011 by Ronnica

This week’s Challenge to Women is particularly applicable to me:

“That, if you are single, you exploit your singleness to the full in devotion to Christ and not be paralyzed by the desire to be married.”

I absolutely love how this is worded. This has been the “goal” of my singleness, but I’ve never been able to put it so succinctly.

I do want to “exploit” my singleness. I love the freedom and flexibility that comes with my relationship status. It truly is a gift. But it’s not a gift to spend on myself.

The second part of this challenge I love just as much. I don’t want to be “paralyzed by the desire to be married.”

I know what it’s like to be paralyzed—or at least partially paralyzed—by the desire for marriage. I don’t want to go back there. I don’t want to be held back by some fear that I may be single all my life.

I also don’t want to make my singleness an obstacle, if that makes sense. It’s easy to allow it to hold me back from going places or serving people. I don’t want that to be the case.

No More Frittering

Posted on July 7, 2011 by Ronnica

Another week, another challenge. I need more challenging…this has been very good for me.

“That you be totally committed to ministry, whatever your specific role, that you not fritter your time away on soaps or ladies magazines or aimless hobbies, any more than men should fritter theirs away on excessive sports or aimless diddling in the garage. That you redeem the time for Christ and his Kingdom.”

John Piper’s language in this one kills me. It really makes me want to use the word “fritter” in daily language more often.

But beyond the language, he definitely has a point. While neither soaps or ladies’ magazines have any draw for me (though I have been sucked into a reality show or two…guess those are just soap operas for another generation), I do struggle with wasting time on insignificant things. Just last night I was talking to a friend about how to encourage her kids not to waste their summer days on television, video games, and the computer, when I had to admit that this was a struggle for me.

Personally, I find the less I watch TV, the less I want to watch it. That is, in part, why I’m choosing not to have internet at my new place. I’ll have cable though (included in my rent…I would have prefer just to have bunny ears!), but that’s not as much as a draw for me as I can’t choose to watch things on my own schedule like I’ve grown accustomed to online.

But I think that’s part of growing in wisdom…knowing when to remove things from your life to avoid temptation. For me, Internet is not a “need”…I work in front of a computer 40 hours a week and have a phone with Internet access.

Where else am I tempted to fritter time away? This is something I’ll definitely have to continue to reevaluate. I definitely spend time on the blog, but I’ve reduced that significantly over the last 6 months or so. Sure, my blog isn’t as popular as it once was (though it certainly was never “popular!”), I’m totally okay with that. I feel like the balance I have with blogging now is what it should be.

So what should I be using my time for instead?

Ministry.

I’ve tried to realign my priorities to this end. It’s still a work in progress, but I do believe I’ve been improving. Since quitting AWANA in January to pursue more training in biblical counseling (they were at the same time, so I had to choose), I’ve been looking for another ministry opportunity. That opportunity fell into my lap last week: our church started a food pantry. You’re looking at the Saturday morning regular (you know, if you were looking at me!).

Between that and Sunday school, I feel like I have an appropriate amount of regular formal ministry. But informal ministry is important to, and something that is hard for me. I don’t like my schedule messed with, but this is an area I’m growing in. I’m single, so my schedule is rather flexible, even when I’m not. So I’m trying to be more proactive in seeking opportunities to serve others. Thanks to some growing relationships in my small group at church, those opportunities are definitely coming.

I think this is something that I will need to continue to work on for the rest of my life, and regularly reevaluate.

Photo by tsand

Deep Thinkin’

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Ronnica

Does anyone else feel like this summer is going super fast? I guess it’ll slow down for me once I actually work a 5-day work week again (haven’t done so since the week before Memorial Day, and won’t again until the week after my move).

On to the next challenge to women:

“That you be women who have a deep grasp of the sovereign grace of God undergirding all these spiritual processes, that you be deep thinkers about the doctrines of grace, and even deeper lovers and believers of these things.”

I love that John Piper mentions that he wants women to be “deep thinkers” about these thing. I think churches like mine often get a bad wrap for our beliefs about women in the church. Just because we don’t think women should be pastoring or teaching men (because of what the Bible says, not because we think that women would be bad at it) doesn’t mean that we don’t think women don’t have an important place in the church.

In no way are we “off the hook” for learning the deeper truths of the Christian faith. Nor are we to keep those things to ourselves, but should be actively applying them to our own life and to be teaching them to others, formally and informally.

The concept of grace–especially the idea that we can do NOTHING for our salvation–isn’t an easy one for me. I like to work for things, and find purpose in doing things. But that’s not where I should find purpose or identity.

As I continue to work on my prayerfulness, I hope to continue to work on how I think about what God has done for me.

Photo by Sunshine Junior

Other Posts in This Series:

Daily Acts of Love

Women of the Book

Women of Prayer

Women of the Book

Posted on June 16, 2011 by Ronnica

Another week, another part of the Challenge to Women. Let’s get to the meat (this week is especially meaty!):

“That you be women of the Book, who love and study and obey the Bible in every area of its teaching. That meditation on Biblical truth be the source of hope and faith. And that you continue to grow in understanding through all the chapters of your life, never thinking that study and growth are only for others.”

Of the ones we’ve done so far, this is the most encouraging. One of the thing that frustrates me about programs, speakers, and books targeted at Christian women is that they are often lacking in depth, focusing on relationships, feelings, purpose…anything but the truth of Jesus Christ as found in God’s Word.

Sure, these are important things to talk about and they certainly have a place, but just because we’re women doesn’t mean that we need the Bible lite, as many of these give. They throw around a few Scripture verses here and there that begin to sound trite after a while. What an incredible shame to make the Bible sound trite, given its richness and depth!

No, we don’t need a few verses here and there scattered among worldly wisdom. We need the Bible. While I know that many women haven’t had the privilege of the great educational opportunities I have had, I still think that we can bring the Bible to women of all educational levels. You don’t need a degree to understand the Bible (and sometimes the degree might be a hindrance!).

So could I be called a woman of the book? I want to be. I want to love, study, and obey the Bible more. For me, my slight adaptation of Professor Horner’s Bible-Reading System has helped me gain a new desire to read the Bible–and to read it more. I do feel like I rely on the Bible more today than I did a year ago, but also feel like I have a long ways to go. I suppose we all do.

In the last few weeks, I’ve also upped my reading of good Bible-based books. I’ve had a hard time putting them down, which is both encouraging and convicting.

I’ve always felt like I had a good grasp on the Bible and biblical truths. But lately through many different sources, God has been showing me how much there is still to learn. I’ll never exhaust God’s Word…how refreshing.

I’ve been incredibly blessed with the teaching I’ve sat under, formally and informally. What a shame it’d be to stop there and not seek any more.

Other Posts in This Series: