Letter to Ronnica, 2015

Have you ever written a letter to your future self?  I’ve done that several times, but I always remember to open them in time, not being as excited about them as I was when I wrote them.  I figured I might as well write this letter here as I’m much more likely to see it!

Dear Ronnica 2015,

Let’s not fool anyone…this is a tad bit ridiculous before an audience.  Reminds me of times when I’ve had to practice a speech before an audience of one.  Let’s try to put that silliness aside.

I have no idea what your life is like, Ronnica 2015.  Perhaps your life is closer to my dream future or my practically planned future, but more likely it’s something/somewhere I never thought I’d be.  After all, my 2005 self would have laughed at where I am today (and my 2000 self even more so).

If you are married or have kids, don’t take that for granted.  Remember well how much you longed for those things when you were me.  While I no doubt have no idea the trials that come with life as a wife and mother, I do know that deep inside of me, that’s what I desire.  Just as I work now to be content where God’s placed me, work to be content where God has placed you.

And if you’re still single, I know you’re handling it.  I have so much still to learn about how to honor God in my single life, and how to balance all the many areas I want to grow in.  Hopefully you’re excelling at that better than I am.  I hope that you have many more days that you are content than nights that you are not.

Don’t be afraid to love.  Hey, I could be writing this for my today self.  I know our tendency to be reserved when it comes to friendships.  It’s okay to put yourself out there…even if you get hurt.  Seek to love others (through word AND deed) as you’d want to be loved yourself.

Though no doubt our interests aren’t quite the same, keep learning.  There is so much to know and so much wisdom to be gained.  Learn from those who go before us and seek wisdom at God’s mercy seat.  Even though you’re 5 years further down the road than I, I know you have so much more room to grow.

Truthfully,

Ronnica 2010

Photo by Muffet

The End of an Era

midnightWhile I was listening to the radio the other day it hit me.  Someone was talking and they said, “Blah blah blah in ’10…”

What?  Next year’s 2010?  Well, I guess that make since numerically.  But that means that it’s the start of a new decade.  A new decade is just over 4 months away!

I suppose it shouldn’t be a big deal.  Time passes.  Our calendar system is arbitrary anyway, there’s nothing special about January 1, 2010 (and yet, that number is hard to type!).

But for me, it’s something more.  It’ll be the end of the decade that, more than any other, defined me. I turned 18 in 2000, graduated from high school and went off to college in 2001, graduated from college and moved cross country in 2005, graduated from grad school in 2008, and now in 2009 I became salaried and will start paying off my student debt before the end of the year.

But when January 1, 2010 hits, all that will be a part of a past decade.  I guess this must have been what my parents felt when the 80s ended (maybe? but they had 2 not-so-little youngins by then, so they were already more “grown up”).  I suppose we all have to go through the getting-older thing, since the alternative is death.

But really, my generation was cheated.  Our decade doesn’t even have a name!

Photo by orcmid

A Classic Question

I know it’s a classic question, but if you could know the future, would you want to?

I was thinking about this especially last night.  I’d love to know who/if I was going to marry, so I could stop messing around with this crush stuff.  (Really, it’s rather optimistic to think that it’ll go away if I just knew the outcome.)

So, if I could know this about my future, I think I would want to know.  Nothing else, though.  But maybe it’s a If You Give a Mouse a Cookie thing, and once I knew that, I’d want to know more.

So, if you could know anything about the future, would you want to?  And if you could only ask one question about your future, what would you choose?

And the Hard Questions

Lynda asked, “Which family member made the greatest impact on your life and why?”
Hard question. I debated about whether to choose my mom or my dad. I love my dad, he and I share many of the same interests (math, science, weather, sports, dry humor). My greatest memory of him was when I was about 10 and my dad, brother, and I were in our garage looking out on a storm. He pointed to a spot in the storm and said, “That’s where a funnel is going to start coming down.” Sure enough, it did, and that’s when he finally answered my mom’s cries for us to get back in the house! I get teary eyed when I talk about my dad. Maybe it’s the father/daughter connection, or maybe it’s his strong, yet quiet character.

But my mom has also had a great impact on my life. She stayed home with us when we were little and then and every summer thereafter (she was a teacher, so she had the summers off with us) she would constantly be teaching us and disciplining us to study hard. I would sometimes hate the flashcards, workbooks, required music practice, and chores at the time, but I know that because of them I have the discipline for my studies that I have today. I’m quick at math, because I did those flashcards and mad minutes. I’m quick at typing because of the hours spent on the typing program on the computer. I’m full of lots of fun facts because of all the fun fieldtrips we went on together and the books (and books and books!) we read together. I guess I have to attribute my love of reading to her too, as she read to us every night and took us to the library every week in the summer so we could grab another stack of books. I’m organized and neat, because I was raised that way (though I might be anyway, it is definitely a trait I share with my mom, along with our strong sense of leadership and stubbornness, which lead to a lot of butting heads through the years!).

So, as you can see, I’m not choosing one or the other. I’ll just choose both. =)

Amanda asked, “Where do you see yourself twenty years from now?”
At first I thought this was a harder question than the standard 5-year version. Then I realized it’s easier to see where I want to be that far down the road without having to worry about all the steps that I’ll have to take to get there.

In twenty years, I hope to be long-settled with a husband and a houseful of kids (though my standard provoking answer is 8, I think 5 is a good number). Hopefully some of them will be adopted, too. Whether we’re living somewhere here in the states or somewhere overseas, I have no idea. I would be okay with either. I hope I’m still involved with the children’s ministry with whatever church I’m at then (though I’d love it to be my church now, teaching the children of the children I have now!).

Erin asked, “What’s your take on Matthew 28 and the Great Commission? Who does this apply to? To what degree should it dictate the way we live our lives?”
Well, they are last recorded words of our Savior before He ascended to heaven, so they do seem pretty important. They apply to all followers of Christ, from those that were gathered around him to those of us today. I don’t necessarily think that this is THE command that we should use as a ruler to determine the activity of our lives (that would be the two greatest commands: Love the Lord Your God with all your heart, soul, and mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself) but it’s a big part of our calling as Christians. Wherever we go, we are to be making disciples and teaching them about Jesus Christ. And I don’t think that we should limit that to those we simply come in contact with (though those people are important!) but we should be involved with making disciples of all the nations (by going, sending, praying, and/or supporting).

And as a late edition to this post (and not so serious or hard), the newly engaged Miss Wisabus asked, “What was your first impression upon arriving at OU?”
I was super, super excited. I just knew that college was going to be great (and it was). Somehow, I thought that greatness was going to start on the first day. Boy, was I wrong. When my dad and brother rolled away early in the afternoon of that first day, I didn’t know a single soul in at least a 100 miles. L.O.N.E.L.Y. Then my roommate came in. Finally someone I could talk to! A friend! She had rushed and was from a Tulsa high school, so she already had a ton of friends. Though she clearly didn’t need another friend she was super friendly towards me and invited me to the frat party that was that night. I was too much of a chicken to admit that I didn’t want to drink and party, so I made something up about being sick or tired. Turns out, I was to meet my first real friends the next day (Kari and Kara) when they invited me to the BSU for pizza. Pizza and bowling…that’s the kind of partying I like! I know I met your soon-to-be-hubby in that first week, too.

She also asked, “What class did you learn the most in during college (or seminary)?”
My intro to biblical counseling class. Blew me away. For a crash course in what we learn, read Paul Tripp’s Instruments in a Redeemer’s Hands. This class totally changed how I viewed sin and sanctification. I’m sure I learned a lot in my college classes too, but nothing that had this kind of impact on how I live my life.

And then she tests me, “Do you remember the first time we met? You don’t have to answer this one because I’m just going to say. I remember that Heather had started meeting with you bright and early (one morning a week, I believe) and how she’d always wake me up whenever she was leaving (light sleeper). One morning I went down there and got some breakfast and we met!”
I remember that, but I thought I had already met you before. I remember going by your room with Dana to visit Heather and meeting you. I remember thinking you were incredibly shy and difficult to crack! Later I realized that’s probably not the case, you just were a little overwhelmed by the stunning upperclassmen that deigned to visit you. Okay, so maybe that’s not it, either.

What You’ve Always Wanted to Know

Before I get started, I have to wish my bro bro a happy birthday. Happy birthday, Riley! Today’s his golden birthday, which means he’s 24! I have no idea if he’ll see this (but his girlfriend will, hi Amanda!), but he did stop by the other day to leave some interesting questions. Perhaps I should have not left the invitation wide open…

Now the moment we’ve all been waiting for…the answers to your questions! I really thought you came up with some good ones and several um, interesting ones. Thanks guys. I’ll be posting this in three parts, with the light questions today, the lightest questions on Friday, and the harder questions on Saturday. Oh, and one of the questions I felt warranted a post by itself, so I’ll put it up on Sunday.

Alyssa asked, “Do you miss Kansas? Will you go back someday?”
Yes, I definitely miss Kansas. Anyone who has been subject to my Kansas-is-so-pretty speech knows this. Seriously though, wheat ready for harvest as far as the eye can see at sundown is the prettiest thing I know. The longer I’ve been in North Carolina, the more I miss my family, too.

That said, I don’t plan on moving back. Unless God totally changes my mind on this, Kansas is about the last place I want to live. Maybe it’s a pride issue or a wanting-to-see-the-world issue, I don’t know. I had the choice of going to seminary in Kansas City, and I never even really considered it. I knew when I was graduating high school and leaving for Oklahoma that I was never coming back. Does that make my blog title misleading? I don’t think so, because I’m totally a Kansan through and through.

Alyssa also asked, “Oh, and what’s on your list for the used bookstore?”
Hmmm, I suppose I shouldn’t have asked you all this question without answering it myself. I didn’t have my list with me the day that I was at the bookstore, so I didn’t get anything. I almost bought Nicholas Nickleby, but I decided to hold myself back. I have a ton of books at home that I still need to read, so I don’t need to start adding more to the stack when I don’t really have the money to spend, anyway. A few of the books on my to-buy (and to-read) list:
The 9 Tailors – Sayers
Anges Grey – Bronte
A Chance to Die – Eliot
Humility – Mahaney
The Mortification of Sin – Owen

Liz asked, “What are your plans after you finish your Masters?”
I’m always embarrassed when someone asks me this, because I don’t feel like my answer is good enough. I know that that’s not true, but I’ve always had grand plans for my life. Right now, the idea is that after I graduate in December I’ll be going full-time where I work now (as I’m in the process for getting the certification I need to do more of the financial counseling) and continue the children’s ministry that I do in my church, teaching kindergarten Sunday school and leading Awana for the older kiddos. I love this, and wouldn’t change it, but I have the impression that people think I should use my degree(s) in some official way. In the future I’d love to be overseas somewhere, but I don’t know if I’ll ever go full-time or just as an encourager.

Iva asked, “What’s a single gal from Kansas eat at night when she’s not hanging out with friends?”
Well, I don’t eat a 5-course meal every night (or any night), but I do enjoy what I eat (probably too much…). Thankfully, I was able to kick the habit of eating fast food when my stress level increased (like right now), because the fast food doesn’t help my health or my wallet.

If I’m eating by myself, I will pick from one of several options:
burrito (my mom taught me how to make a batch and freeze them individually as a kid)
cheese quesadillas and black beans (this is probably my favorite option!)
salad
pizza (nothing beats a $1 meal!)
spaghettios (sometimes I’m a kid again)
pasta in butter sauce
breakfast burrito
canned soup
tuna salad sandwich

I also try to cook a full meal once a week for a friend or my roommate as well as to make leftovers for lunch (though I pretty much refuse to eat leftovers for dinner or for lunch on Sundays). My roommate feeds me a lot as well (thanks girl!), and I often grab something when I’m babysitting from their pantry, not mine.