Tag Archives: Homosexuality

“Born This Way” or “God Made Me Like This”?

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I read Justin Lee’s answers on Rachel Held Evans’ blog, and I’ve been chewing on it for a few days. To better understand what I’m going to say here, read that post. Justin’s words didn’t necessarily change my views on homosexuality, but it did refine how I express them a bit.

For the record, I don’t understand how Justin makes the leap to the idea that marriage can between two individuals of the same sex. Like in all issues, I believe the burden of proof in a Christian debate belongs to the one who is going against traditional Christian understanding. Not saying the Christian status quo is always right, but to go against what has been handed down to us through history, you should be able to provide reasonable proofs for that breakaway. I haven’t seen that from Justin, though to be fair, he says he will be addressing that more.

But is it wrong to be “gay?”

Yeah, I put “gay” in quotes, because I think that there is already a worldview assumption by labeling someone “gay” or “straight,” and that is that our sexual attractions are a defining characteristic. I don’t believe that’s the case.

I do believe people when they say that they were born with desires for the same sex. I was born with addictive tendencies, but that doesn’t excuse my addictive thoughts (“I have to have some ice cream”) and behavior. So I’m not opposed to the idea that someone is “born this way,” as long as they’re not using that an excuse for their sinful thoughts and behavior.

But I don’t think it’s right to say “God made me like this,” because God has better plans for your life than for you to be marred with sinful desires. Unfortunately, you are born with a sinful heritage and aren’t perfectly how God created you. But if you trust that He did the work to pay for your sins, you can be born anew. God doesn’t usually remove our sinful desires, but He can use them to mold us more into the person He wants us to be.

So then, is it wrong to be attracted to someone of the same sex?

Yes, and no. It is wrong to look lustfully at anyone other than your spouse, no matter their sex. But I don’t think it’s wrong if you look at someone and think, “Wow, they’re attractive.” But we rarely leave it at that, do we? Most of the time we continue to look, dwell on the thought, and play with it in our imaginations.

Sexual sin is rampant in our culture. Even among the most sexually conservative, it’s usually believed to be okay to look, but not touch. But this is not the standard that the Bible gives us (see Matthew 5:27-28).

God sets a hard standard for us. One so high that I believe it’s impossible to live by apart from the grace of God.

Ah, and that’s the sweetness. Regardless of our history and regardless of our desires, God offers us His mercy through His Son and his grace through His Holy Spirit.

While I don’t like the term “gay Christian,” I think it’s possible to be saved by the grace of the God and still struggle with homosexual desires. These desires can be frusterating, I’m sure, because there’ s no lawful (speaking of God’s law) fulfillment of these desires.

But all our desires will ultimately be eclipsed by God and great goodness and blessings.

So what is a Christian who struggles with same-sex desires to do?

First of all, they need to share their struggle with a couple trusted, mature friends. Hopefully, you’re already in a church family so that makes the choice easier. Your small group leader, a pastor or their wives would be good people to ask to come alongside you.

You may never be attracted to someone of the opposite sex, which means you may never get married. In that case, you’ll be given grace from God (day by day!) to live a celibate life. Will that be easy? Absolutely not. I know this because at least to this point, I’ve been called to live a celibate life.

I’ve already gone on longer than I usually do, but I don’t want to end before I encourage my fellow Christians to share the compassion and grace of Christ. That means we don’t joke about homosexuality or fear those who have homosexual desires.

Did you read that post (linked above)? What are your thoughts? You’re always great, but remember to be civil in the comments.

Quotes, Including Mockingjay Quotes, Spoiler-Free

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“…you won her over. Gave up everything for her. Maybe that’s the only way to convince her you love her.” – Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins, p. 329

“Many churches speak about homosexuality in terms of sin and judgment but about divorce in terms of forgiveness and grace. When a same sex couple goes down to the courthouse to petition for a marriage certificate, the Christians show up with sandwich boards. Do they also show up when their congregants go to the same courthouse to petition for an “unbiblical divorce?” Likely not. And the hypocrisy on this issue has not escaped the next generation.” -“Why Our Generation Doesn’t Care About Prop 8″ by Jonathan Merritt

“I asked the children [from the suburbs] where the slums were. But they said there were no slums near where they lived, only far away, in the city.” – The Love Wife by Gish Jen, p. 44

“We’re fickle, stupid beings with poor memories and a great gift for self-destruction.” – Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins, p. 379

“Annie, being a virgin in this day and age is something to be proud of…you’re like a unicorn.” – Shirley, Community, “The Politics of Human Sexuality”

“He is the God that understands that I just miss being loved by a lover….I am blessed in the truest sense of the word.  I am also a little lonely.” – Amy Beth Bullard, “The God Who Understands”

“Finally, he can see me for who I really am. Violent. Distrustful. Manipulative. Deadly. And I hate him for it.” – Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins, p. 232

“A proud person tries to reinvent reality. He tries to redraw the borders of human behavior to suit himself, displacing God as the Lord and boundary keeper of life.” – Not the Way It’s Supposed to Be by Cornelius Plantinga, Jr., p. 125

“I noticed, too, it was the cruelest thing you could say about a person–that they were small.” – Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessl

(advice given against early engagements) “…if a man is going through a woods, and sees a good young sapling, he may mark it and come back afterward and get it, if he can.” – Most Famous Man in America

” ‘Oh, no. It costs a lot more than your life. To murder innocent people?’ says Peeta. ‘It costs everything you are.’ ” – Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins, p. 23

Logical Conclusions

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How about a little controversy, shall we?  It’s been too long, hasn’t it?

If I only had to go by the reaction to the Judge Walker’s decision on California’s Proposition 8 that I saw on Twitter, Facebook, and television, I’d assume he was the people’s hero.  I hope that’s not quite the case…I know I’m not the only one saddened by last Wednesday’s decision.

Though I don’t know if I’ve specifically mentioned it (in 999 posts…yes, that makes tomorrow’s the 1000th…get ready for it!), I don’t think you’d be surprised to find that I take the biblical, traditional, and (until recent years) only definition of marriage.  We all have the right (regardless of our sexual preferences) to marry an unmarried adult of the opposite sex.  Equal rights.

So yes, I was saddened by Judge Walker’s decision.  But you may be surprised to know that what saddened me wasn’t primarily the decision against marriage.

First, I was disappointed that the federal government once again has unconstitutionally taken away power from the states.  If the people of California decided to refine “marriage”, I would have to accept that (though I would still argue that they are wrong).  That is their decision.  But the decision was taken out of their hands.  They no longer have that right.

And if they no longer have that right as the residents of California, I no longer have that right as a resident of North Carolina.

But more than that, what saddened me was that there is now a precedence for the out-right disregarding of gender.

We no longer have to use the slippery slope argument.  You can get a judge to almost anything as long as they have a legal precedence to do it.

And now there is.

If gender no longer legally matters in marriage, should it in a draft?  I think it’s pretty clear that the logical answer is “no.”

What about dorm room assignments?

The sex of chaperones on school trips?

“So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them.” – Genesis 1:27, NASU

I think this is a pretty good time to remind you of the comment policy.  Thanks, loves!

Photo by Joe Gratz

Gay Worms?

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I wrote this post a year and a half ago.  The study I mention is not so new anymore, but that’s not the point of the post.

What I’m about to write could be offensive to someone who holds different views than me. Know that I am writing this not to be hurtful or insensitive, but as an attempt to speak truth to a controversial issue.

Are gay men and women born gay? The culture has leaned more towards answering “yes,” but I’ve always leaned towards “no.” Most homosexuals argue that they have always had those feelings, and I certainly can’t argue with that since I’m not them. A recent study from the University of Utah on worms found that you can trigger an apparently heterosexual female worm to be attracted to other female worms and act just like a male worm. This study is complicated further by the fact that this particular species of worms actually have both eggs and sperm, but that’s not the point at all.

Though this is a very limited study and is a long way from proving that humans can be born gay, let’s for argument’s sake say that sexual orientation is a trait that we are born with. Okay, that doesn’t make homosexuality any less sinful. A sin is a sin.

From the fall, man and the rest of creation have been corrupt. God original design of marriage has been marred by polygamy, divorce, adultery, and homosexuality. We are ALL sinners, but have various temptations. Just because it might seem easy and natural to follow my own sin patterns (and it certainly does) does not make it any less sinful. The sin is in the choice to follow the temptation (whether to relish a thought or to carry it out), not in the temptation itself.

I’m thankful that in Jesus Christ there is hope for all sinners, even one as vile as I.

Though you, my dear readers, have been nothing but the best, I want to remind you to be civil and respectful of all people and all viewpoints in the comments section. That said, I DO want to hear your comments!

Men and Women of Whom the World Is Not Worthy

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Sunday’s sermon was out of the end of Hebrews 11. Certainly not a fluffy message, but neither is the gospel.

“Women received back their dead by resurrection; and others were tortured, not accepting their release, so that they might obtain a better resurrection; and others experienced mockings and scourgings, yes, also chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were tempted, they were put to death with the sword; they went about in sheepskins, in goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, ill-treated (men of whom the world was not worthy), wandering in deserts and mountains and caves and holes in the ground. And all these, having gained approval through their faith, did not receive what was promised, because God had provided something better for us, so that apart from us they would not be made perfect.” – Hebrews 11:35-40, NASU

Though this was written over 1900 years ago, these things are still happening to Christians throughout the world today. Can I be frank enough to admit my first thought was to condemn liberals as hypocrites? They fight for the “rights” to homosexual marriage, abortion, and equal treatment of animals, yet they aren’t fighting for the rights of these people to live and practice their faith without persecution.

Then God gently reminded me that I’m a hypocrite too. What do I do on behalf of these people?
Honestly, the persecuted church isn’t something I think about very much. Who wants to be reminded of the horrors done to others when they can live their comfortable life in ignorance?

There’s not a lot that I can do to these people that suffer. Oh, but the most important thing: pray. I need to pray for those that are put through torture, imprisonment, and more. I can pray that God will provide them with the strength and perseverence that they most desperately need to live, and may their lives be a witness to the truthfulness of their message.

Most of all, Lord, come quickly.

Offending in the Name of Christ

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I’m a Christian from Kansas, but I do NOT agree with the radical demonstrations of Fred Phelps and his followers. I can’t fathom how they believe that their antics are advancing the kingdom of God. Maybe that’s not their point at all.

I am deeply hurt when I hear about protesters interupting a funeral to make a scene and draw attention to their beliefs. That is clearly not the way to win hearts. I’m deeply grieved by those who are so blatantly offended in the name of Jesus Christ.

These protesters were at my brother’s graduation from college in May. The campus is not far away from the town where Fred Phelp is the pastor.

Ronnica

NaBloPoMo, Day 14