Ignorant Historian

Just a handful of searches that lead to this very blog:

“obsessed with my past wedding”

I can’t help but think that that’s not healthy for a marriage.  Unless you’re Miss Havisham, and then well, it’s just not healthy, period.

“lipsmaker ingredients”
Crack?

“Lord Ignorant”
I prefer to be called “Lady Ignorant,” thankyouverymuch.

“quotes on dealing with ignorant females”

Sure WOMEN can be ignorant just like men, but at least we don’t call you all “males.”

“why my sil will be sleeping hard”
Amanda, care to chime in on this one?

I love my teaching profession
As opposed to a teaching hobby, I suppose. (Wait, I DO have a teaching hobby.)

lunch detention for tardies worksheet
Don’t be a tardy!

“wedding uno”
But it takes dos to wed, and THEN you’re uno. (Dare you to yell out “Uno!” at the next wedding you attend.)

“easter r dress”
Ummm…

“how to grow gernamiums”
I hear they respond better when you get their name right.

“edward is”
“Stalkerish,” “creepy,” and “not hot” would all fit that blank.

Bing search: “major points for pro-choice”
For all their hullabaloo about being the better search engine, they certainly got this one wrong.

As nasty as these things are, they seem to pass quickly, praise God.

Disposable ice buckets make excellent barf buckets.

Having a nurse for an aunt is incredibly handy.

Watching my brother make his wedding vows is incredibly surreal.

My brother’s friends don’t remain high schoolers forever.

Illness is a great distraction when I’m trying not to cry.

Just because he’s getting married doesn’t mean my brother will stop being a pest.

Being ill gets me out of talking to virtual strangers.

Though the thought of most food makes me want to barf when I have a stomach bug, wedding cake still sounds appealing.

My brother can be kind and compassionate (to his sister!) when required.

My dad will always go to great lengths to care for his daughter.

When I’m ill, it’s always best to have my mommy around.

I hadn’t planned on blogging this weekend.  I had thought I’d come back Monday with a cutesy “it all went well, and they’re married” post, but it seems that further developments require me to share the story with you prematurely.  At least if someone laughs at the situation, then I can feel like there’s some good from it!

So, last night after the rehearsal, I got ready for bed late.  Two of my Seattle cousins were sharing a hotel room with me, and I was doing my best to be quiet as I finished packing and showering while they slept.  As I lay under the covers, I felt unusually tense.  I assumed it was stress and/or the bed, but I found out otherwise shortly.

About an hour later, I woke up extremely hot.  I took measures to be cooler (including sitting on the cold toilet seat!), and was eventually able to cool off enough to get back to sleep.  Which lasted about 30 minutes.

At which time I knew I had an imminent date with that cold toilet, but didn’t quite make it.

Is now the time where I should say you might not want to read this if you’re queasy?  Or is it too late?

Yes, in the hotel room that I was sharing with the cousins I haven’t seen in 3 years, I threw up on the floor.  It’s a bad habit of mine; not making it to the bathroom (not that I throw up often).

At that point, I knew something was up.  I knew the tenseness and hot flashes I was feeling were not stress, but something far yuckier.

Not having any reasonable medicine, I woke up my cousins to ask if they did (they did not).  I found out later that they weren’t able to go back to sleep right away…I felt so bad!  I don’t want others to be miserable simply because I am.

Then I went down to my parents’ room and cried for help. That’s what parents are for, right?  My dad was able to find a 24-hour gas station in this 2,500-person town, and bought me a bottle of Pepto.  The color of which I promptly saw in the toilet bowl several more times in the middle of the night.

Scared to go back to bed, I slept on the recliner in my parents’ room.  I was able to sleep for about 45-minute stretches in between bathroom runs, so I certainly didn’t get much sleep.

When it was time for me to start getting ready to go to the church (5:30 AM), we knew we had a real problem on our hands.  I hoped it would have gone away, so that I wouldn’t even have to tell the bride, Amanda.  Unfortunately, there was no hiding it from her.

As an aside, Riley and Amanda were both incredibly gracious to me, carrying more for my health than my ability to participate.  She even texted me on their wedding evening to check in on me!  I’m so happy to be able to officially call her my sister.

So I went to church late (7 AM), with just enough time to get my hair and makeup done before picture.  I had one more bathroom run, but thanks to some medicine from my nurse aunt and her warning to eat and drink NOTHING, that was the last of it (I hope I didn’t jinx it…I’m not in the clear, yet)!

I was feeling better by pictures, and was able to fully participate.  But, as the time drug on and the drowsiness of the medicine started to kick in, it was obvious to all that I wasn’t all right (I’ve heard I was anything from pale or gray to green from various sources).  Thanks to some fast acting, I was made to lay down on a back pew until it was time for me again.  Without those naps between pictures and the wedding, I wouldn’t have made it!

Praise God, I was able to stick out the wedding, and look normal while doing it.  It was funny how many people whispered “Are you sure you’re okay?” to me as I walked down the aisle to take my place as maid of honor.  I actually think my sickness kept me for tearing up as I likely otherwise would have.  About 5 minutes from the end, I knew that I was on my last legs, but I made it…and promptly took a 2-hour nap during the reception.  At this point I was able to slowly introduce water back into my system, of which I was very grateful.

I also slept through the clean-up (I promise that I didn’t fake it to get out of work!) before we made the hour-and-a-half ride back to my parents house.  I’m thankful to be in some borrowed pajamas and resting with the TV to distract me (I have a hard time concentrating on reading at the moment).  I hope to take a nice bath shortly and hope into bed.  Here’s hoping for a must-needed good night’s sleep!

And that’s how NOT to spend your brother’s wedding.

Yesterday went smoothly, though it was pleasantly exhausting.  I love my job…have I mentioned that before?  Seeing the joy in someone’s face as they know they won’t have to pay as much as $500 to get their money back is priceless.  I also have had several returning clients get so excited to find out that I’m still here as they want me to do their taxes again!  Makes your day to be wanted like that.

This’ll be a short week as tomorrow night I’ll be flying out of here (barring snow!…though it’s not in the forecast).  The last two times I’ve tried to leave the state, the weather has changed my plans.  On top of that, it thundered here on Sunday, and people here in North Carolina say that means that it’ll snow in 7 days.  Have you heard that saying?  I haven’t, and neither had my friend who’s from Pennsylvania.  Is it just a North Carolina thing or have you heard of it, too?

I’m looking forward to this trip as almost all my extended family will be there.  While obviously my brother Riley and Amanda will be in focus as the groom and bride (I know that we don’t say it that way usually, but if I say it the other way, it’ll look like I’m calling my brother the bride!), we’ll also get some good family time in, too.  I took good notes on how to be a good Maid of Honor at my last wedding, so I hope I’m up to snuff!

For obvious reasons, I’ve been thinking about weddings a lot.  Not about my own dream wedding, but about making that type of commitment to one man, for the rest of my life.

A former roommate (and current blog reader), Cindy, would have phrase she’d say when she’d come home from yet another of her friends’ weddings.  “The cheese stands alone.”  You know, from “Farmer in the Dell?”  Everyone else gets picked, but the cheese stands alone.

As much as there is  joy and happiness in seeing a good friend get married, there is some loneliness in being left behind.  We’re social creatures, and I believe that we’re designed for marriage.  That desire within me is good and right…as long as marriage stays in its place, not taking the throne of my heart.

I often say that I’m okay with being single, as long as I’m not the only one.  When I take the time to count my blessings instead of crying over my losses, I do realize that I have a sweet life now.  Many of my favorite things about my life would be changed if I were no longer single.  It seems like I have to remind myself over and over to enjoy them now while I have them.

But yet part of me worries about being the last one married (or never married at all).  What if all my friends get married?  They all want to be married, so of course I want that for them as well.  But selfishly, I want at least a couple of them to stay unmarried at least for as long as I am.

As my roommate rode with me on our way back from Georgia and heard me tell the story of what Cindy would say.  Her response?

“The cheeseS stand alone.”

Indeed.  Why do I worry about the possibility of being the only one of my friends still single?  That’s not where God has me yet, and may never have me.  And if that’s where He wants me, He’ll give me the grace to endure it.

So maybe the cheese doesn’t stand alone after all.

Photo by orangeacid

* Because of the potential wrinkle of snow/ice, we left for Georgia at 7 AM on Friday.  It was 37 degrees when we left Raleigh.  When we arrived in Newnan, Georgia at 3 PM, it was 26 degrees.  We went from North to South, from the coldest part of the day to the warmest, and we lost 11 degrees.

* Even with the cold and the snow on the ground in Newnan (just a dusting, but it was too cold to melt) I still wore flip flops the morning of the wedding.

* I know this’ll sound vain, but my hair looked GOOD.  All it took from my usual hairstyle was a couple of crystal-studded bobby pins.  I’m going to have to put my hair back like that with bobby pins more often, because it keeps the long curls around my face from looking droopy!

* Though I’m very thankful I didn’t trip, I did lose feeling in the entire bottom half of my feet during the ceremony.  Since the Lutheran service next week will be much longer than the Baptist one, I’m going to have to get creative on how I won’t lose feeling in my toes.  I think the key is not to wear the heels one minute longer than I have to before the wedding, which was a strategy I took up only after the wedding this time.

* It was nice to walk back down the aisle at the end of the wedding and actually recognize a couple of people.  This next wedding, I’ll recognize more than a couple…

* Not quite weekend-related, but I went to the doctor yesterday for a physical and was told that I’m significantly short on Vitamin D.  I cut out tanning last year for health reasons, but it seems like it’s had the opposite affect!  The good thing is that while I haven’t had any noticeable symptoms, it was caught so I can be treated.  I think my body’s been telling me all along that I need the sun.  Low Vitamin D levels have been linked with fatigue and joint pain, so I’m hoping getting back to adequate levels will give me more energy and help the pain in my knees.

* Also, my glucose is high, so I now have doctor’s orders to exercise and cut out some carbs…something I knew I should have been doing anyway.  Having the doctor tell me, though, is what I needed to actually do it!

The wedding went well without any hitches.  The only person who tripped was the flowergirl, and that was more cute than embarrassing.

Not that I don’t have anything more to say, but I don’t have more time to say it.  But a picture is worth a thousand words, right?

I can’t believe how quickly the week went.  I was about to say my first full-week back went quickly, but I forgot that I’m off tomorrow (again).  Even after realizing that it was only 4 days, it still seems fast.

Tax season begins a week from tomorrow.  Eek.  Even though I’ve been preparing for it for months, there still is a lot that I have to do in the next week to get ready.  I’ve been working hard to find every (free! we’re a non-profit) way I can to promote this free service.  Sometimes I think it would be easier to sell if it was in fact something we were selling and not just giving away.

Once someone has come in and realized that there is no catch, they will come back and often bring several friends in, too.  Word of mouth was the primary reason we were able to double the amount of returns we did last year!  If you’re local (Wake County), and make less than $49,000 or know someone that does, please spread the word!  You can find all the information about the various sites throughout the county on our website.

Enough tax talk.  On the more immediate horizon, my good friend April is getting married Saturday.  I tried my dress on on Monday…I was having scary thoughts about it not fitting, and not realizing it until Saturday morning!  I think I’m all set to brave the snow as we drive down to Georgia…very thankful that the trace to 1 inch we’re expecting  is coming overnight (if at all) and not while I’m driving.  It’s also all interstate (from about 2 minutes from our door) and my roommate will be with me, so don’t worry (Mom, G. Zoe…I’m talking to you).

This is my first time as a bridesmaid, so that’s something new.  I just hope I don’t trip over my slightly-too-long dress in my high heels!

In 6 months, I’ve spent one night away from my apartment, and that was just to babysit overnight.  I enjoy being home, but I’m also a traveler at heart, so I’m starting to get restless.  Good timing too, because half of November and December (and a week of January!) will be spent elsewhere.  Here’s what I have coming up and has me so excited:

November 6-15 Turkey (a post with more on this is forthcoming)

November 26-30 Kansas for Thanksgiving with the family and my sister-in-law’s shower

December 15 My birthday, stuck in the middle of everything else!

December 17 Phantom of the Opera!  I’m going to have to borrow back my video so I can watch it again before then.

December 19-29 Kansas, Texas, and Kansas again.  I’m visiting family in Kansas for the holidays and spending some time in Texas with my college roommate and her niece.

January 8-10 Georgia (know I said that with a fake Southern drawl in my head) for April’s wedding (she was my first non-roommate friend here in North Carolina).  Just bought my dress for her wedding.  It looks like this, only navy:

Sorry it's a bad picture...we were in a hurry because the bride was waiting for a ride at the airport!

January 20-25 Kansas, for my baby brother’s wedding!

Once all that happens, it’ll be tax season in high gear for the next couple of months.  I’m glad everything worked out just like this…I think I’ll be ready to buckle down and get to work after all the traveling!

When I travel, I love to read.  Do you know of any good plane reads?

A couple of weeks ago, Caity blogged about ideas for personal blogs.  Being a personal blog writer, I took note of several of her ideas.  One of her ideas was to write about your dream wedding.  Perfect follow up to yesterday’s pursuit of marriage, no?

Of course, the downside is that if a perspective husband reads my blog this week, I might come off as desperate.  Yet, yesterday’s post was the outworking of my inner wrestling, and today’s is just for fun.  I don’t spend much time thinking about that day, but of course I talk about it with my girlfriends from time to time.  I’ve also been thinking about it a bit more now that Riley and Amanda are tying the knot.

Given the fact that only one half of the couple in today’s simulation is known, absolutely nothing is set in stone (except for that half of the couple…I’m still planning MY dream wedding).

So here are my thoughts on how I’d want it to go down (in no particular order):

Groom: I have a few ideas, but I’ll keep them to myself.

Dress: Something flattering?  I guess that shouldn’t be a question.  I do want something flattering.  I think my bridesmaid dress is flattering, so maybe something like that.  Which, umm, I’ve never shown you a picture of.  So something like this (Amanda…isn’t this kinda like the other dress that I tried on?).  Not so much bead work, though.

Ring: I guess this would be figured out before the rest (well, except the groom!), but I’m kinda going out of order here, anyway.  Yellow gold, with a solitary diamond, maybe round.  Nothing fancy, and preferably not overly expensive. Something that looks like this.

Bridesmaids: If I got married today (uh, late notice, huh?) I would have 5 bridesmaids.  Scratch that…I wouldn’t, because they wouldn’t be able to all make it in time for me to get married today!  Regardless, I think they know who they are.  They’re some great ladies!

Their dresses would probably be lilac, because I’m obsessed with that color right now.  I always have liked periwinkle,  so that’s a strong possibility as well.  For sure, it wouldn’t be a shade of orange or red, but anything else could be fair game, theoretically (which this all is!).

Flowers: I LOVE flowers, but I’m not a fan of them off the plant, for whatever reason.  Probably, I’d keep this simple.  My favorites are tulips, but they’re so seasonal, so unless I time things right (and really, I’m not going to worry about this one!) I’d probably do something like single gerber daisies for my bridesmaids and a cluster of 3 for me.  Ooh, I can picture that…that’d be kinda cool!

Shoes: I’d strongly consider going barefoot.  I love heels, but I also love being barefoot.  Maybe my bridesmaids as well…but definitely not any of the men.  Men’s feet are ugly!

Location: in a church.  Though a marriage is a marriage no matter where the wedding ceremony, I like the symbolism of doing it under God’s roof, so to speak.  Though this would quite possibly be an issue with my family, I’d want to get married in my church, here in North Carolina.  Though I still consider Kansas home in many ways, I want my wedding vows witnessed by those who I’m asking to help me keep them.  I’m thinking my brother getting married closer to home may have paved the way for me to do this, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there…

Vows: Write our own.  Not trying to buck tradition for tradition’s sake, but I think that the vows I’ve heard at several friends’ weddings were scriptural and poignant, not trite.

Engagement: Short, unless providentially hindered.  Three-six months would be nice.

Reception: I always joke that I don’t want to go to mine, but will leave after the ceremony.  I can’t imagine what the backlash would be on that, though!  Seriously though, I’d go for more casual than elegant, more like a party than a ball.  No dancing.  No way.  (and no, it’s not b/c I go to a Baptist church…it’s because I can’t/won’t.  Except in the privacy of my bedroom.  Or the kitchen, when my roommate’s not home.)  Food would also be casual…snacky stuff, but lots of it.

Cost: As cheap as possible.  I know this is easier said than done, but there are few areas where I wouldn’t be willing to skimp.

Attendees: all of you! (Well, except you, creepy dude, who just stumbled onto this!)  Children would be welcome, for both the ceremony and reception, though I might have childcare available for the littlest ones during the ceremony so that my new-mom friends won’t have to excuse themselves halfway through.  I don’t plan on it being very long, though!

So, since this is all hypothetical, you don’t have to hold your tongue about the tacky decorations or the rap music I walked down to the aisle to (no, I wouldn’t).  Seriously  what do you think?  If you’re married, what’s one thing that you would have changed, if anything?